What I learned in THE BIG EXPERIMENT! by Kim

It was an interesting week and while there was a part of me that viewed it as a lark, I learned quite a bit about how I do things and where my priorities lay.


First let me say that Honey is one of the good ones...typically helpful and engaged. That being said...knowing that the blog was going on and that we were openly discussing husbands did make him step up his game. It was fantastic to have him identify what needed to be done and just do it. Of course I know that he'll do anything if I ask but sometimes, especially after a day of being after Shorty to do this or get that done, I already feel like a big, old nagging shrew and I don't want to be that person. Not having to ask felt AWESOME and more like we were a team instead just me being the taskmaster. I definitely prefer the team approach.


I need to find a way to get Shorty to do her chores without me being on top of her. It stresses me out, makes me "unpleasant" and is a huge time suck. I don't want to have to ask her to put her laundry away more than once - by twice I'm annoyed - by the third time my head spins around and I'm yelling (which makes me feel like crap because it's just laundry....however). It's a situation that needs to be resolved, I'm just not sure how to do it yet.


Like Diane I also ran out of milk (although never wine!) and we definitely ate out more than usual since I didn't go to the grocery store. My typical routine is to decide what we're going to have that day and shop specifically for that dinner. I've got to start planning ahead for the week, shopping for it on the weekend, and then actually cooking the things that we planned. My problem is that what sounds good on Sunday rarely appeals to me when it comes time to cook it on Wednesday - I'm going to have to get over that and find some ways to get all of us engaged in menu planning.


Having scheduled commitments made me accountable in a way that allowed me to meet my work goals.


Grouping errands together by task and proximity saved me a huge amount of time and driving.


Getting a workout in is the single best indicator of how my day is going to go. I feel more alert, confident, relaxed, energetic, and positive. Yet it's the first thing that I let go if I feel overwhelmed/busy, which is ridiculously self sabotaging!  I've got to actively work on changing that mindset.


Having my days scheduled out along with the caveat that we stick to the schedule as closely as possible, really allowed me the freedom to be actively engaged with Shorty when she got home from school instead of trying to fit in all the little tasks that I normally would, like cleaning up the kitchen or folding the laundry or answering emails. It was good for us and I'm just going to have to find another time to get those things done....over a glass of wine in the evening?


I'm pretty damn lucky to have the support of my husband, daughter and friends, something that I already knew but came to truly value and appreciate last week.

You're freaking amazing - be sure that they know it!!

The final post in our series on resumes, how to handle the holes and other pitfalls that cause us heartburn as we try to get back into the workplace. We feel that this post was the most important and also the thing that we're all least likely to do - so work on bragging!

Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals.

What do you think is the biggest mistake that women make when writing/rewriting their resume?

Not taking full credit for all they bring to the table and not fully recognizing or appreciating their own worth or corporate value. Using “I’m just..,” or “I’ve only…” at the beginning of any sentence.

Women sometimes dismiss or internally diminish incredibly valuable skills and abilities, thinking they have less value, somehow, or mistakenly believing that openly recognizing their own value and worth equals arrogance.

Of all the times in your life where humility may pay, writing your résumé is not one of them.

Surely it hasn't been THAT long!? *@#!! I'm old!

This week we're continuing our focus on resumes, with special attention to the areas that make us want to pull our hair out, kick the cat, and consider a new career as a carny. Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals.

What about dates? Do I have to put the dates I received my degrees?

For employment, you don’t need to include months, you can just list years (i.e. 2005-2007), but you have to include dates.

For college degrees, you can omit dates in your résumé, but expect to provide this information at the interview or application process. Understand, too, that while your reader probably won’t give this too much thought, he or she is likely notice that the dates have been omitted.

My Mission Statement: To get a job.

This week we are focusing on resumes, with special attention to the areas that make us want to pull our hair out, put on the stretchy pants, and consider a new career in competitive eating. Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals.

Is it absolutely necessary to have a mission statement? If so, how do you write a mission statement for your résumé (especially if your mission is to just get a job)?

First of all, never forget that your résumé is a marketing piece or that you’re writing your résumé for the sheer and complete benefit of your reader.

Imagine, for example, an ad for vacuum cleaners that begins with the statement, “We really need you to buy this vacuum cleaner so we can pay our electric bill.”

At this stage of the game, your reader doesn’t care what your hopes or aspirations may be. They simply want to know whether or not you’re qualified for the position and company you’re targeting, whether it’s in their interest to meet you, in person, to learn more, and how they may benefit by hiring you.

Later, at the interview stage, your needs and interests will become more important. But for now, it’s all about the reader.

So if you include a mission statement, or preferably a summary of qualifications section, keep the focus on what you bring to the table and how your skills, abilities and characteristics will benefit the company and meet its needs and expectations.

For example, a typical objective statement tends to focus more on what the candidate hopes to secure than what he or she brings to the table, but this can be altered by focusing on the reader’s interests:

“To secure the position of ________________________ at (Name of Company) where my skills in ______________________, _______________________ and _____________________ may best benefit (Name of Company)’s ____________________ goals and expectations.”

The BIG Experiment!! Day Two by Diane

6:30-6:45 Hit snooze button several times, wake up late

6:45-7:30 Find that wonderful hubby has done most of the laundry AND the dishes while I was in a coma last night! Wake up children who complain of stomach aches and cry about having to go to school. Check emails, try to drink coffee in between yelling at kids to get a move on.

7:35-7:45 Still in pjs, scramble into car and push kids out at carpool. Go back home. Planned to run this morning, but since it is raining, opt to stay in pjs and get to work. Sigh at the thought of having to workout on Saturday instead.

7:45-8:45 Look at presentation that I have to give this week and realize that I am SO not prepared! Anxiety runs amok and I decide to get ready for my 9:30 meeting (volunteer activity) instead.

9:30-11:00 PTA meeting.... get so much information and added to my to-do list for volunteerism.

11:00-noon Start going through all of the emails that have ended up in my in-box. Get caught up in it, send Kim a note that I am running late (gotta love technology)

12-12:45 Meeting with Kim at coffice very productive. Realize that I forgot to brush teeth this morning. Resolve to be better tomorrow. Go home and RUN mail to the mailman, who has decided to be kind and wait for me. Get upset at morons who can't do their jobs thoroughly and now have to make another phone call/write letter/send it in AGAIN.

1:00-2:15 Brush teeth. Eat. Blog. Determined to finish resume.

2:15-5:30  Kids come home and immediately ask what we are doing today.  Pout when I tell them "nothing".  After getting them settled with snacks and homework, pretty much ignore children.  Research and work on my resume.  Children interrupt on occasion, and I have a notedly short temper with them.  Resume working on my resume.  (remark that resume and resume are spelled the same, less the accent - I think it's time for a break!)  Youngest watching his 30 minutes of TV (turns into an hour).  Resolve to manage time better tomorrow for second time today.

5:30-6:00  Wonderful hubby is already preparing dinner.  Youngest upset that we couldn't go to Toys R Us today.  I set out to tackle the mount of folded laundry that covers the dining room table.  Enlist children to help, when I notice it's all MY stuff.  Put away laundry, have children set table, feed dog, etc.  Scan and email document to friend, return phone calls from friends.  File some of year's worth of bills so that I can finish taxes for accountant.

6:00-6:30  Sit down and enjoy wonderful dinner.  Food is so much better when someone else prepares it, don't you think?

6:30-7:00  Dishwasher still running (again!  this never used to happen!) so dishes are rinsed and left in sink for tomorrow.  Wonderful hubby irons his new shirt (?!)  I sit down to do more research and work on blog.  Kids playing Wii and don't interrupt.

7:00-7:30  Get kids ready for bed after tearing them away from Wii.

7:30-8:00  Write to-do list, check email. Panic about meeting tomorrow - more about fitting into my old business suits, which are probably VERY out of date, than the actual interview/meeting.  Panic about presentation on Thursday.  Resolve to take tomorrow one step at a time.  Have glass of wine to calm myself.

8:00-10:00 Exhausted and ready for bed, but somehow manage to watch film with subtitles in its entirety.  Overall an okay day.  I'll be better tomorrow!

"She said what?!?"

This week we are focusing on resumes, with special attention to the areas that make us want to pull our hair out, get loaded, and consider a new career as a rodeo clown. Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals.

What are some key words should you include in your resume? What words should you avoid?

Include terms that are relevant to the field, position and industry you’re targeting and the positions you’ve held in the past. For example, an engineer should use the verb “engineer” (or “engineered”) somewhere in his or her document. A manager should be using the verb “manage” (or “managed”) when describing his or her work. And yet you’d be surprised how often this doesn’t happen. Other strong verb choices for someone in a leadership role include: Guide, Direct, Drive, and Lead, among others, and yet you’ll see résumés that have bullet point after bullet point leading with “Responsible for…”

When you’re writing your statements of responsibility, lead these statements with strong action verbs that show your reader your direct role and level of responsibility. Avoid phrases such as “Responsible for…” or “Duties included…” which dilute the strength of the statement.

Avoid words that feel inflated or are words you’d never use in your normal speech. When I read “Elevated Customer Satisfaction,” I wonder, “Would this person actually say “elevated” in an interview or any other situation describing his work?” Probably not.

Despite a variety of career related articles suggesting that phrases such as, “Proven record of achievement in…” or “Extensive experience in…” should be omitted from the résumé, I disagree. Include these kinds of declarations, but back them up with proof. If you have extensive experience in any area that’s vital to the position you’re targeting, it’s good to let the potential employer know this, but don’t stop there; tell the reader how this expertise will benefit him or her. Example:

“Extensive experience in brand building and market share. Consistently penetrate competitive target markets and increase revenue growth, even in challenging economic climates.”

Function versus Form?

This week we are focusing on resumes, with special attention to the areas that make us want to pull our hair out, eat a tub of Ben and Jerry's, and consider a new career as a balloon animal engineer. Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals

How do you organize a functional resume, as opposed to a chronological resume? Is that the best way to go?

A functional résumé is typically used by job candidates who:

• Have gaps in employment they want to hide.
• Wish to bring relevant, but possibly less utilized, skills to the forefront.
• Want to bypass titles which poorly reflect actual work responsibilities or accountability levels.
• Hope to change career paths and therefore want the reader to recognize transferable skills.

All of which are great reasons. The problem with using a functional format is that most hiring managers and HR directors know why candidates use functional résumés, too, and often will look for the very problems the candidate is trying so hard to hide.

A functional résumé is typically organized by skill groups or areas of expertise, with examples of these skills applied (but not where or when), followed by a brief outline of job titles, company names, locations and dates (without description). Example of order of information:

• Name
• Contact Information
• Summary of Qualifications (brief)
• Functional Headings (such as: Marketing, Management, Project Leadership, etc.) in the order of their value and relevance to the position and company being targeted – with bulleted details showing these skills applied, and including the results of the candidate’s efforts and contributions
• Employment History (in reverse chronological format, with little or no detail)
• Education
• Relevant Professional Associations (optional)
• Community Service (optional)

There are HOLES in this resume!!

This week we are focusing on resumes, with special attention to the areas that make us want to pull our hair out, crawl back into bed, and consider a career in origami. Our guest blogger for this series is Sue Campbell, 1st-Writer.com, a professional resume writer and career strategist with over 18 years experience helping job seekers of every level achieve their career goals.

How do you cover the "holes" in your resume for the time that you were out of the workforce?

Rather than trying to hide gaps in your résumé, fill them, instead.

If you haven’t been spending any of this time in self-improvement, it’s not too late to add a layer of current activity to your résumé through volunteer work or education.

Actively employed candidates will always be viewed as “more hirable” by hiring managers. And candidates with recent experience will appear more “current.” However, if you’re reentering the workplace after a significant time away, you can give the same impression of being current by showing recent activity in areas deemed relevant or valuable to the types of positions and companies you’re currently targeting.

First, determine what skills, abilities and characteristics (personal and professional) the potential employer is trying to secure in potential candidates. This information is usually obtained via job ads, recruiters or company research.

Next, consider in what ways you’ve actively applied these skills in the recent past. Consider personality characteristics along with applied skills and technical abilities, such as communication, problem-solving, time management and resource allocation skills.

Create a summary section that focuses on that which you bring to the table – TODAY – in relevant skills, abilities and characteristics, and then show the reader your most recent application of these skills – even if this was through a continuing education course (leading with your education) or via non-paid community service – early in your document.

The what, where and when is always going to be important – but what really matters is what you CAN DO, and how what you can do –your efforts and contributions – will benefit a potential employer.

"Step away from the cabinets, Ma'am!" by Kim

Diane's post brought back the agony that I went through when I had to redo my resume this past summer - by the time that it was all said and done I think that the whole thing took me well over a month. My previous resume was LONG gone on the hard drive of a long gone computer; fortunately the resume that landed me the life-changing job in Asia had been written by Sue Campbell, a wonderful resume writer who is infinitely more organized than I. I asked her to email me a copy and *poof*, there it was in my inbox. I opened it, looked at it, closed it and went to clean out my bathroom cabinets. :)

A couple of days (weeks) went by and I opened it again and started the process of adding the past 3 years of experience. But even with a model right in front of me (of my own resume no less), I couldn't spend more than 10 minutes without getting frustrated and walking away from it. Finally, with input from Husband, family, and friends I had enough *stuff* to fill out the questionnaire that Sue had sent me and quickly dropped it back in her lap to make me sound fabulous!

All told it took me about a month to get to that point - it's silly as I sit here thinking about it now but the paralyzation was vividly, painfully real at the time and now it's time to update it again, sigh. Writing this blog and getting to talk with all sorts of other women facing similar challenges has been incredibly cathartic for me - it's great to know I'm not alone, I mean I'm sorry for them and all but....you know what I mean.

We'll be talking with Sue this week to get some input and practical advice for rewriting, recreating, or just freshening up your resume. In the meantime, if you want to start some forward momentum or can't stand the idea of cleaning out those bathroom cabinets again, here are a couple ideas to get you moving:

1. Start small - just a rough list of all of your personal qualities (both good and "challenging") that you can think of. Don't forget to incorporate the items from your career in MomWorld that Diane identified in "Thoughts for the Interview". Now...ask husbands, friends, family members - only people who will be honest but not brutal. Live with your list for a couple of days - add to it but don't take anything off, we tend to edit ourselves way too much. It's your opportunity to brag, do it!

2. At the same time, especially if you're starting from scratch, start working on a VERY simple timeline of your career - dates, places, titles. It seems excessively easy but after a couple of years at home, I'm lucky if I can recall what I had for dinner last Tuesday, much less where I was and what I was doing in 1998.

3. Once you've identified the places/times that you worked, start sketching out the details of the jobs and responsibilities that you held while there. Again, this is the very simple 65,000 foot view of things, the bare bones.

Our expert, Sue Campbell of 1st-Writer, will give us some pointers on how to get from here to there later in the week, so we can start to pull all of this together.

We're going to do this together in baby steps, so....get off your ass, leave those cabinets alone, and get started!

New Years Resolution #1 - write resume!

Well, it's a brand new year! The holidays have passed and we moms can get cracking on that job search! A week ago, I spoke to a friend of mine about my past career-life. I told her about what I did and how I did it and then she asked if I would be interested in doing some consulting work for her company. Sure! I thought, just what I need! Then, the other shoe dropped... she asked me for my resume... YIKES! Resume? What resume??

Procrastination, my current bff...

For many of you already out there and ahead of me on the job search, resume writing was a daunting task. But, when you have had at least 3 different computers over the last 8 years and haven't bothered to save your resume file, let alone update your resume every year or so, the task is down-right overwhelming! It is one of the things easily shoved in the back of a drawer somewhere, with the thought that you'll eventually get back to it... I'd rather clean out my bathroom cabinets than work on my resume! I have now been avoiding my friend, with a paying job for ME, for a week!!

Why on earth is this such a difficult thing to do?! Maybe it is because it is so hard for most women to brag about themselves? Maybe it is because it takes focused thought that most of us don't have time for (but need to make time for)? Maybe it is because all of my pre-child memories leaked out of my brain during the birthing process??

Sure you can hire a resume writer, or download a resume template, but you still have to THINK about what to put on your resume. And what happens when you can't remember what it is that you used to do, or for whom you used to work??

I'm looking for tips??? Anyone??? Please comment with any helpful suggestions!

Well, at least I have a very neatly organized bathroom!

Thoughts for the interview...

Pat yourself on the back for going on an interview, Kim! Maybe it was an exercise in humility, but it certainly was good practice! Your wonderful husband and daughter are right, you have accomplished so much. Often, I feel that we SAHs don't give ourself enough credit for what we have accomplished... I got my kids out the door this morning without screaming at them, for one. Hey, it's no small feat in my world!

So, what else have we accomplished?

Let's take a look at all that volunteering:

Kim worked the book fair, for example. Here's the spin:

1. You successfully managed a team of 20 individuals.

2. You had a budget responsibility for 20% of the "company"'s gross profit.

3. You managed to increase your own department's budget by 10% from last year - even in these challenging economic times!

4. You assisted your company in reaching 106% of its annual revenue by the second quarter, even better!

5. What about how your team built a strategic marketing campaign to reach its target audience? Your team, under your leadership, no less, utilized new marketing and advertising techniques (ie: social media, print and e-newsletter ads, etc.)

6. What else? Did you come in under-budget? I'm sure you did!

If we begin to look at our non-income generating activities as if they were an actual job, which they are, then we come to realize just how much we have done, how much we have learned, and even if the PTA book fair isn't a Fortune 500 company, that activity has added to our "work" experience, and it needn't be forgotten!

Are you there job?? It's me, Diane...

Gotta love that story!! Hurray for the interview... I haven't even gotten there yet. As with many SAHs we now have the option to go back to the same career or industry, or to engage in a new one. Regardless of which we choose, we all have to reinvent ourselves. Not only are we now moms, but we are older (gasp!), wiser women. We should be able to ask for, and receive, what it is that we want. So, that begs the question: What kind of career do I want??

My husband asked me to write down all of the things that I would be happy doing, regardless of whether they were actual careers. As I pondered this, I thought, "gee, I'd be happy doing anything, as long as it was in the right sort of environment!" I want to work for a company in a position that is flexible, one that is challenging and engaging, and one that puts me in contact with (relatively) intelligent adults. I want a career that doesn't require me going back to school or spending tons of money to re-educate myself. As much as I'd love to be a child psychologist, my heart just isn't into studying late every evening and spending my afternoons around skinny 20-somethings who have never even had a child, but want to analyze them. I admire those of you who have the drive to do this, its just not me.

So, where am I going to find this job?? And more importantly, how am I going to convince them to hire me? What do I bring to the table??

For one, I am resourceful (always have been) - meaning that if I don't know the answer or how to do something, I will figure it out (fairly quickly, I might add). That's why I can fix an air-cooled VW bug with a gum wrapper and some duct tape.

Secondly, if you are willing to be flexible with my schedule, I will actually work during the hours that you employ me! Instead of surfing the net, tweeting my friends or checking facebook statuses. And, I promise, no blogging on the clock either!

I will get twice as much done in half as much time: Moms need to be efficient. We are masters at multi-tasking. We need to get as much done as possible in a short amount of time!

How will I do this? I am educated, experienced, and confident. I am able to make decisions quickly and easily, and I'll have a spreadsheet to back up my reasoning. I am a leader that others will respect (just ask anyone who has worked for me or with me in the past). I am also, because of the flexibility, the most talented and experienced individual that you will get for a reasonable price! We are former directors, VPs, managers of multi-million dollar companies, who managed teams with multi-million dollar budgets. Don't think we haven't continued to be efficient just because we managed our smaller household budgets!

Now, how do I put that all in a resume???