So I know that I promised a follow up story about THE INTERVIEW, but it's just too humiliating to recount...suffice it to say that the formidable, confident, well-spoken woman who had managed huge projects and earned millions of dollars for my respective employers totally deserted me. In her place was a sweating, stumbling, inarticulate mess and as I watched myself in a sort of out of body experience I wondered "what happened?"
A few years of being out of my industry had left me unable to converse about it and more importantly I'd lost the confidence, once an intrinsic part of my personality, that enabled me to sell myself, my talent, and even to spin my challenges into benefits for a prospective employer. And the farther I bumbled along through the interview, the worse it got and the further my confidence sank.
That experience was a massive blow to my belief in my ability to get back into my industry, or really into the work place at all. It stayed with me for quite a while and as a result I tabled my job search.
Sitting here and being able to look at it with the perspective of a bit of distance, I can say that I haven't lost that woman or her abilities - all that I lost was the self-confidence that propelled me in all the endeavors that I have ever decided to undertake.
I can't pinpoint when I regained that confidence again. It could have been reviewing my resume and realizing all that I had accomplished or reminding myself that although I haven't been in the office I've accomplished a hell of a lot at home and in my life during this time. It was in no small measure to the cheerleading of my husband - he's never doubted me, nor has my daughter. It's probably all of that and some stuff I can't even name - but regardless, it's back and it's been tempered with a little humility now.
I can't tell anyone else how to regain that drive, sparkle, cockiness, and complete confidence in her abilities but I would suggest that it hasn't gone away - it's just hiding, waiting for you to remember that this time away from the workplace has only made you better, stronger, more able to multitask and be empathetic. Diane's post perfectly describes the qualities that SAH moms have gained in our time away from the workplace - but they do not define us, they simply are additions to the fierce women that we were before.
All that being said, when you are ready to get back into the fray and start interviewing, a little preparation goes a LONG way in reducing the sweat factor! I found the below link today - it provides real interview questions and responses from a HUGE array of industries - it's too varied to be useful for rote memorization and boilerplate Q&A but it'll remind you of the lingo, the tightrope walk and the language of your industry or industries that you might want to explore.
http://www.consultingcase101.com
I'm now able to remember who I was but more importantly I can celebrate who I am.
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